As I was going through all the recent comments in Facebook, it occurred to me that for many of these folks – those I know well – Facebook is like catching up. I know what they’re up to in real life, and their Facebook comments reflect that. It’s sort of like an extended party, and I like it!
Then there are those I don’t know well – acquaintances. We rarely speak in public, and I often have no idea what they are up to. I certainly don’t know what they are thinking. But when I read some of the stuff they publish, I am amazed. It all seems so intimate. He or she would never tell me this in public, yet in written form, their mind is revealed. It makes me feel like we are closer than we really are, which can make things very awkward in real life when we meet. We may pass each other on occasion and barely give a nod, yet I know what they are thinking, and they may be thinking the same thing about me. We know a part of each other, but not the whole thing. We know secrets.
I sometimes feel like a stalker or a voyeur when I’m on Facebook, especially with some of the younger kids who are on my friends list.
Is it my fault that they are so open with their thoughts? No, but I also really, really shouldn’t know some of the stuff I know thanks to their posts. Some of their secrets should be kept secret. They have no filters (yet) for appropriateness, and even though I love how young people think, I sometimes see things I probably shouldn’t.
It used to be that I had to invest a ton of time in a person’s life to get to know them well; now, all I have to do is get them to friend me. It’s instant intimacy… without true intimacy. It’s “plastic” intimacy, which has no substance.
I think that in the next 10 years or so, we will see an increase in the number of extremely lonely people who can’t function well in the real world. Facebook is great and all, but it can never truly replace live contact. People will eventually (re)discover this fact, but I think it will take time – a breaking point of some sort – before the pendulum of societal norms swings back.
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