Laziness can become a very comfortable norm if you let it.  I’ve been in such a place for a while now and it’s not a great place to be.

I remember back a few years ago when I started blogging.  I had recently lost my big-time engineering job; I was cash rich and had abundant free time.  I was motivated to make the most of it.  I was going to write the great American novel. I was going to travel the world.  I was going to learn a foreign language or two.  Alas, just as I was heading towards these goals, a start-up opportunity came up that seemed OK, but really wasn’t what my goals were all about.  I probably shouldn’t have taken the job (looking back, definitely not!) because it had nothing to do with my goals.  But even with the start-up job, I was motivated to achieve something special… at the expense of the things I actually wanted to do.  I loved the people I was with and there was the very real possibility that we would all get rich.  When that job crumbled, I assessed what I’d like to do next, since now I needed money (having sunk a lot of it into that start-up).  I prayed about it, and did some personal inventory tests designed to show me my skill-set.  Much to my surprise, the results didn’t show me that I should be an engineer, but a writer, teacher or preacher.  I soon crossed preacher off the list because I didn’t have the passion required to do the job excellently.  I crossed writer off the list because, while I like writing, I couldn’t see myself doing it all the time.  This left teacher.  This was God’s divine direction for my life.  As soon as that decision was made, I was relentless in pursuing a teaching credential.  I was again motivated.  I got through the credential program quickly and… didn’t immediately land a job.  The timing wasn’t right to get a full-time job for this school year so, I languished for the better part of the school year as a substitute teacher.  I do not have any passion for substituting (though long-term is awesome), so I now wait for that perfect job that I know God has for me… and I’m getting tired of waiting.  I’ve also been sick a lot recently – lots of kids with germs.  All of this has gotten me out of any motivation I once had and I’ve become a regular couch potato who dreams of teaching full-time and going to exotic places during summer break, but is currently glued to a couch.  Maybe, once I get a job and get settled into my field, I’ll start writing again and I’ll learn some foreign languages.  You see, my passions haven’t changed, but I’ve become too lazy to actually pursue them, I only dream about them.  It’s sort of sad, and I don’t like what has happened to me.  I could be doing so much more with my life right now!  I’m not too old, I probably have 20 more working years left, but 20 years isn’t an unlimited amount of time to accomplish some of my life goals.  I’ve already blown 10 years thinking about writing but not actually getting past a few chapters in any of the writing projects I’ve started.  I have done some travel, but not as much as I would like to.  I’ve forgotten any foreign language skills I once had because I don’t go overseas much and I haven’t keep the practice up.

So, God issued a wake-up call for me today.  He said that I need to focus, prioritize, and get off my butt.  I need to this anyway, since I have to take an “English Language Arts Teaching Methods” class in order to get my English credential (so yeah, next month I’m back in college), but I should also work towards making the things happen that will make me the happiest: time with God, time with family, teaching, writing and traveling (foreign languages will come naturally as a result of doing these things).  Good news is that my life isn’t a total loss at this point: I’m back with God; I’ve never left my family; I’m working on a Turkey & Greece trip; I’m continually working towards getting a full-time teaching gig.  I now need to add exercising and writing every day.  What I really need to wake up every day with purpose, something I have not been doing.  I need to become a living example of how to live life to the fullest.